2017-04-28

Sexual taboos

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The word came from the Polynesian language where it meant a religious prohibition for average people. With time the word “taboo” began to mean a prohibition imposed on any action, word or object which is associated with danger in people’s consciousness. Very frequently taboo is the reason for the adoption of some laws or sets of laws by the government.

Certainly, taboos change with time. In the primitive society the appearance of taboos was caused, first of all, by the safety considerations, for example the taboo against incest. Similar sexual taboos are preserved in the present-day society. But are they still caused by our safety considerations? Or there exist other reasons for taboos? Especially sexual ones?

The sexual revolution of the 1960s considerably shortened the number of sexual taboos. A lot of things that used to be considered inappropriate nowadays are freely discussed in various talk-shows, on the Internet and just among people. But despite the fact that taboos are usually established by the society some individuals have their personal taboos. And there are certain differences between the taboos of the society and those of an individual. The society rejected a lot of sexual taboos, retaining mainly those ones whose breach is connected with any kind of danger. As for individual sexual taboos, they are formed on the basis of personal experience, feelings, upbringing peculiarities and other factors. That is, they are often caused by the personal complexes of people. For example, we cannot say that in the present-day Russian or European societies oral sex is a taboo, since it is widely discussed in the magazines with a rather high circulation, however, for many separate individuals it is still something intolerable, dirty and unworthy – a taboo.

That is why, imposing taboos on particular actions you should realize the true reasons for such prohibitions. Very frequently it turns out that we fool or at least try to fool ourselves. For example, lady N. accepts only traditional sex, any experiments in bed are a taboo for her, she considers any unconventional kinds of sex to be dirty and herself – a highly moral personality, since she does not “stain” herself with them. In reality, such an attitude is often just a manifestation of complexes.

And complexes can spoil your life. Firstly, they can prevent you from enjoying your life, they are sure to do it. Secondly, they can spoil the life of your sexual partner too. He or she may be upset about the absence of the habitual pleasures in the sexual life. Besides, a common misunderstanding is possible in the couple, for example uncertainty about a woman’s figure may make her switch off the light during a sexual intercourse, but a man can take it as a remark aimed at him.

That is why complexes should be overcome, but still distinguished from the natural unwillingness to do something. For example, if your partner suggests you trying sado-maso, and having heard your refusal supposes that you are just with too many hang-ups, perhaps it is not worth it to step over yourself.

Sexual taboos should not be regarded as the sign of sexual complexes or tightness. For instance, the taboo against sexual relations with strangers can save your life. So, be free but careful!

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